This is from lost.cubit.net… I cannot believe this. Lost was the only show I didn’t watch on TV, waiting for each season to come out on DVD… And now Cornficker fucked lost!!!! WTF??? Read this and weep… Buaaahhhhhhh!!!!!

“In a bizarre series of events, not unlike many of the plot-lines in the veteran island mystery drama, LOST co-creator, executive producer, showrunner and writer, Damon Lindelof, has abruptly broken all ties with ABC and quit the show, just a few weeks before the hit series’ fifth season finale. The unexpected departure has left ABC executives and LOST producers scrambling to quiet concerns over the series future. Lindelof has largely been regarded as the driving force behind LOST, and the main source and inspiration for the shows overall direction. His premature exit has many industry insiders questioning whether or not the sci-fi pop-phenom will even return for it’s sixth and final season next year. More after the jump.

Reports from Hawaii indicate Lindelof went into a frustrated rage on the set early this morning after the Conficker Worm severely corrupted his laptop. Doogie Knarp, a miniature model builder working on the LOST set, reported hearing Lindelof scream at a cowering grip, “Don’t you get it? It’s gone! All of it! There is no backup! We got conf*ckered! I can’t take this anymore, it’s just like Y2K!” Doogie described what happened next as “unbelievable”. “He just snapped. He had this crazy look in his eyes. He took his laptop and threw it on the ground, then jumped in one of the prop-buses and repeatedly drove over the computer – back and forth. After that, he picked it up and threw it into the ocean. All the time, with this odd laugh and those eyes. Then, he just walked away, saying that he quit.”

Tan Leer, a local non-union seamstress, was sewing a patch onto a jumpsuit when she heard the commotion. “I was just finishing up the Dog Catcher uniform, when I heard all this yelling outside. At first, I thought it was Carlton and Damon arguing about another continuity error, but then I realized there was none of Carlton’s usual high-pitched crying – so I went to see what was going on.” Tan found Lindelof bashing a script supervisor repeatedly in the head with a rolled up screenplay, and immediately tried to pull him away. According to Tan, Lindelof shoved her back, and then turned his fury on her, “I was scared. He looked crazy, and I knew he had some Parker Jotters in his pocket. You could really hurt someone with one of those!” But instead of physically attacking her, Tan says Lindelof broke down and started to weep uncontrollably, “You don’t get it, do you? I lost everything. Season six, gone. Dark Towers, gone. All my notes for Star Trek XIII, gone. The scripts for my upcoming 12 issue miniseries Ultimate Gambit vs. Mole Man, gone. Nash Bridges – The Motion Picture screenplay, gone. It’s all gone, all of it. Years worth of work, gone. I’m finished!”

Two hours later, Lindelof allegedly called into a morning radio program on WFTW hosted by Chet Waller. “We were talking about the rumors, about Lindelof… you know, having fun – and all the sudden, he calls in”, Chet described the occurrence. Recordings of the program feature what appears to be a very subdued Lindelof making a brief statement about his actions earlier in the morning. “I just want to say, I’m sorry for what happened this morning. I lost my cool, and that isn’t acceptable. I’ve just been under a lot of pressure lately, not that that is any excuse. Now that I’ve had time to think about things, though, I realize this is all for the best. I just don’t need that kind of stress in my life. And, to be honest, we didn’t know what the hell we were doing. I mean, Charlotte’s on the island five years before she is born. The runway was built for the plane to land on, but they didn’t know to build it until someone from the plane went back in time and told them. It’s all chicken and egg. We were just making it up as we went along, and I have no clue how we were going to reach a logical, rational ending next year. I think this whole Conficker thing just helped me realize I don’t need all this. Someone else can figure it out. I really just need to simplify my life right now.” When asked if he would be returning to LOST, Lindelof replied, “Never. Never, never, never. I left the island, and I’m never going back!”

LOST creator J.J. Abrams could not be reached for comment, and ABC has not released any official statement on the matter. The eleventh episode of the fifth season of LOST airs tonight, April 1st, on ABC at 9pm EST. The season finale is scheduled to air May 20th.

 

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